A few months ago, I spotted an interesting profile on Instagram, maintained by a real-life sadomasochist “dominatrix” named Lunatika. In my neverending quest for interesting content to present to my readers and followers of my Instagram, I decided to drop her a line to see if she might be interested in doing an interview. Luckily for us, she said yes.
Thank you, Lunatika, for sharing your time and a piece of your world with us!
Who are you? Tell us a bit about yourself and your life!
I’m Lunatika a French Dominatrix. I’m most known for my extreme plays such as genital torture, dirty games in all the ways such as uro/scat/vomit etc… All kinds of intense things that you can imagine. I’m a total pervert.
But in parallel, I’m also a student in Criminology. I’m passionate about psychology, sexuality and criminology. I’ve gotten more seriously into those studies since I have been in lockdown because of Covid19. I had to stop my travels, so I’ve taken this opportunity to get back to studying.
What was your childhood and your youth like? Did you have a “normal” upbringing or something else?
I’m a child of a French father with Germanic origin and a Sicilian mother. I’ve mostly grown up with men, my father and my brother.
I dressed like a boy for long time when I was living with my father. Wearing my brothers clothes (He is 5 years older than me), having short hair cut, never had beautiful long hair. I wasn’t a feminine little girl and had no woman around me apart my grandmother.
When I started to look more like a little woman, they all started to tell me how I have to behave as a woman. At that time, I was seeing my mom and her mom regularly, every two weeks. It was the same things all the time, principally from my grandmother (my mother’s mother):
“Girl don’t say bad words…”
“Girl don’t whistle, this is for men…”
“A woman has to stay in the kitchen and cook dinner for her future husband…”
“A woman has to iron her husband’s clothes…”
etc…All this sort of shit for absolutely everything.
I didn’t understand why I should do that, and not my brother or all my cousins… I was the only girl and the one who has to serve them?! That just made me mad. I had been brought up as a little boy, so I waned to have same privileges as them. I quickly realized that men had the power, and I wanted it too.
Later on, I was living one week in my father’s house and one week in my mom’s house. They had different sorts of education. My father was so relaxed and peaceful, but my mom was a tyrant, ahah (I’m in very good terms with her now). When I was in my mom’s house, we were living next to my grandmother’s house (the same who tried to teach me how to be a good “future wife”), and she was also Catholic.“No sex before the wedding, the woman should be pure!”
“No child before marriage, he will be a bastard!”
“Women who have multiple partners are just TRASH!”
etc…Again, all that sort of shit.
And worst of all, she forced me to pray before going to sleep. I didn’t even know it… I didn’t want to learn it. I was just moving my mouth as she was saying it, to make it look like I knew the prayers. I’ve always closed my ears when that shit is being fed to me.
My brother and me were the only ones in the family to didn’t have take the first communion and all those things. I think it is because my mom was married to an atheist, so we didn’t have that pressure to do it, and had more freedom than the others.
When I went to college, I had to cut the contact with all my Sicilian family because of all of that religious pressure. My way of life was not compatible with their beliefs. I’m not a member of the family anymore, not in that Sicilian side.
I was the only girl in the family and they all wanted me to be the perfect, pure, cute and smart girl. And then, they got the absolute opposite – a pure obscene demon.
I also made a not-intended coming-out at that time. I had a beautiful goth girlfriend at school, and the educational advisor from the school just called all my family to say that I wasn’t normal because I was having a homosexual relationship, and that it was my parents’ fault because they were separated.
I’ve started to hate school and all the systems built around it… They just didn’t like me because I had an alternative look and openly showed my sexual attraction. But I wasn’t a bad student or a troublemaker, I was just against the school system and didn’t want to get into it.
When did you start to develop an interest in sadomasochism and dark sexual play?
My interest started when my sexual desires appeared, I guess during puberty.
I don’t know how and why, but those were the kinds of things I was looking for on the internet… I was 13 or 14 years old.I was interested in violent sexuality, hardcore sex and then I discovered the “BDSM” world and the “D/s Play”. It is how I’ve started. I got involved in a virtual D/s Play with a Master at that time, but it was not my thing to be a sub so we stopped.
During my teenage years I met lots of boys who were having different fantasies than most of the others, like foot fetish, urophilia or strap-on… Don’t know why, but they just came naturally to me, and they talked openly to about these fantasies, without having the fear of being judged.
I guess I was giving them confidence so they felt free to talk about and ask me things they couldn’t with anyone else.
Why do you think you became interested in these things?
I think it is because of some things from my past. Situations that I’ve unconsciously liked that I consciously absolutely did not to like at that time. Or due to extreme dislike, like trauma, I should say. If I analyze myself, I feel like I’m reproducing some scenario like that.
I mean, these things didn’t come from nowhere… It is inside us, it is in our very dark side. I’ve just chosen to let that dark side become a part of me instead of pushing it back.
Do you consider yourself genuinely “evil”, or is the sadomasochistic “Lunatika” a sort of role you play?
I’m not playing a role. As I have said to lots of people who have asked me for some specific scenario during a session: I’m not an actress, I cannot pretend to be or do something if I’m not feeling it. If I start playing a role, I will just laugh and find it ridiculous.
During the session I’m just myself, no differences between me and Lunatika and I think it is the thing. I’m just myself.Do I consider myself genuinely evil? I think not but I know and feel that I have an evil entity that is stuck to me and that I have to feed the urges that it has.
What goes through your mind when you engage in sadomasochism? Is it just a “power trip”, or is there a deeper meaning in it for you?
In a real heavy sadomasochistic session, I’m just getting out of my head, everything is on pause. I have full control of my partner (I love to consider them as victim or prey in my head) and that makes me feel so good, don’t know if I really can explain it. I enter into a bubble.
Before the session, I love to organize the scene precisely how it is in my head, having all the tools/gears near me, etc. if not, I will be a bit frustrated. I love to think about what kind of torture I will do to them, to imagine the scene and to get mentally stimulated. If something touches my brain, then it stimulates me sexually. I don’t need someone attractive, just need somebody who will completely give his body and soul to me.
During the session, I love the fact that I see the person completely restrained without any risk of escaping, completely mine. Love to see them struggling, screaming/crying, begging etc. All those sorts of noise and complaining gives me goosebumps, and I just laugh at them.
If I have blood, I just get obsessed. I love to see marks and blood, this is something that visually excites me too, and I see that as a “piece of art”, the body is a blank canvas ready to be painted.
For those of us who have no experience of BDSM, what is a “session” like? What happens between a dominant and a submissive? is it just sexual release, or something else as well?
Well, there are different sorts of sessions and different ways to see it – as many ways as there are people practicing it.
Everything is defined before starting the very first session. I talk a lot with them, I need to know everything because when we are in, I don’t want them to talk or say something they should have said before (don’t like being disturbed), and same for me, I have to say how I want it to be, how they have to behave.
Before booking a session, I ask about their experiences (I’m not taking beginners anymore), how they discovered it (not a huge fan of people who have been watching too many pornos about it), what are they limits and if they want to have them pushed or if they have any extreme taboos that will be better not to try to play with, any health problems, etc.
Outside of my professional life, I have slaves that have been mine for years and that I know perfectly. I can have fun whenever I want, and to do whatever I like to them. They are probably the ones that I prefer because they give me complete freedom on their bodies and they let express myself the way I like. BUT there are also very good slaves on my professional side that are amazing too, there are just fewer real ones, but they do exist!
As you already understand, I love to have full control on somebody and not to “play a game for an hour”. That was nice when I started, but now I need the full experience or nothing.
In my point of view, in my professional side, BDSM is practiced to give a balance to a person who has lots of power in his life. Somebody who is very dominant most of his time and needs to release the pressure, to go on the other side. They need somebody who will take full control over them, the way nobody is doing to them in their vanilla life. I’ve observed that mostly on men because they are the ones who come to me more. They have that pressure to be “The Man”, the husband, the worker, the father etc. Society has built this image of the man who must be the family authority. I’ve asked some of them: “Why don’t you practice with your wife?”, and they all said “she will never accept it – I’m the man.”
There are also some men who are out of the traditional family system and live the sub/slave life 24/7 with their Mistress. The ones I have, they come to see me for regular sessions and don’t have a sort of pressure or something like that; they just know their place and choose to live like that.
I separate also D/s play and SM play, for me those are different things and the session will be different for these two types of people (there are many more differences and sub category but for myself I prefer to only separate in two categories). There are some sadomasochistic guys that want a session but are not sub/slave and don’t like this sort of thing, they just like to receive pain but not receive any order or to play all the “theater” around the session. Same goes for some sub/slave guys that are not into sadomasochistic play.
Ejaculation shouldn’t be the goal of a session. To me, BDSM is a long and constant preliminary, to always get in the limit, and get a mental orgasm more than other thing! It is in this way that I can know if somebody is really into it or not.
I’m talking here about my own experiences – if you ask to somebody else they can probably give different answers.
You describe yourself as truly sadistic. What does this mean?
This means that I’m turned on by being sadistic, more than anything else. But this is not only in torturing cocks and balls. I love to be hard in many different ways and just seeing somebody struggling and start crying because they are in difficulty. Sometimes, for some people, some little things can be torture. I love to know what they don’t like and to make them do it, or at least to let them know that it can be something that can happen.
Are you ever worried about your own safety in your BDSM life?
For me to get worried, it has to go to a very extreme point. I’ve been practicing slowly and also evolving slowly, learning some specific practices from professionals. So, I know what I can do or what I cannot do, what can be dangerous or not. I’m not doing something that can be potentially extremely dangerous.
I’m not practicing extreme stuff with somebody I don’t know. We have to do a first session and get to know each other, even on a pro level. There are a lot of fantasy-driven guys in this scene who will say “I want you to torture my cock!” or some times even much less than that. But when the day comes, they are shitting their pants and will say “I don’t know if i’m ready for that…”
It is very important to feel the partner , communicate a lot with them and see if they are really into it and ready to take pain (or other stuff) or if it’s only pure fantasy that they have on their mind.
Giving pain: Yes. But give it to somebody who is healthy, mentally and physically. You never know what can happen, BDSM can destroy somebody, we are playing with a heavy dark side. Don’t fuck with that.
Do you think everyone has this darker side to them, or just people who are somehow categorically “different”?
I’m convinced that everyone has a dark side, absolutely everyone, and sometimes more so the people who look like they are “normal”. I mean, we all have our past, our traumas and all those things – it just depends on the way you want to express them/not express them, accept them/not accept them, heal them or push them back.
A lot of people get their ideas about BDSM from movies and television shows and stuff like that. How close to reality are those portrayals in your opinion?
Well, I just think it is all lots of bullshit. No one apart from those who are really involved in the scene can really know how it really is, there is so much about that that no movies or shows can tell you about. There are lots of aspects of the scene, including the psychology, the philosophy, the bonds between the partners, the way to handle it etc., that we never see in movies. But apart from giving extreme pain for example, we really have affection for our partners. I love to say “Soften the meat before eating it”.
And also the ones who are just going to a public party: they are just having a Fetish/BDSM party but lots of them are not practicing in real life, they just want to show that they are “into it” but if someone like me is trying to do something a bit to hard for them they’ll say “Oh my god, she is crazy, she has nothing to do in here, she is dangerous!”
You have a lot of tattoos. Where does your love for them come from?
It really started when I was 12 years old. I saw pierced people and I was like “Wow this is really attractive” I was feeling really excited about it. I started to research all the piercings that exist and see which one I would like to have!
My first one was the medusa, still one of my favorites. I asked my father for so long “Please, please, please, I want it!!!!” And every time he told me “No, you are too young and even if I say yes, after that, you will have you genitals and your nipples pierced!!” And he wasn’t wrong – I’ve had all that pierced, too, haha. He also said “You want to do like people from tribes?” Then he showed me some stuff and I got more into it and started to learn about where piercings came from historically.
So yes, he finally brought me to a tattoo/piercing shop where I got my piercing, and I was the happiest girl! I was into piercings for some years, but at 15 I started to get my first tattoos (my parents weren’t ok with this, so I had to get them out of a shop).
I was first doing it to know how it will feel. I was really curious. I got it done on my butt cheek to be able to hide it. I really loved the sensation of it. I discovered the endorphins and then fell in love with it, and I just wanted more and more!
Your looks obviously differ greatly from the masses. What kinds of reactions do you usually get from people? Has anybody been scared by your looks?
Yes people get scared, but I’m used to it now and I prefer it that way. I don’t really appreciate much when people come and talk to me in the street or anywhere else, unless it’s at a special meeting with people who have the same interests as me.
I’m also not doing all those tattoos on me to have people looking at me. But more and more people are getting interested in that stuff, and almost every time I go out somebody comes to talk and asks questions about my tattoos or my “dark” look.Sometimes it’s ok, but I don’t like it when I’m going food shopping, you know… Or other people in the city that take pictures of me without any consent or just want to do a selfie with me. Piss off.
What are your spiritual beliefs? Satanist? Atheist?
I’m a spiritual woman but I’m not into a specific religion. Lots of people think that I’m a Satanist because of my inverted cross on my face. I’m against Catholicism, yes, but that has to do with my past and my own experience with it.
Are you a fan of horror in general? Horror movies, books, etc.?
Yes I like horror movies and gore movies but I prefer if it is with disturbing psychological story. If not, I will not feel much about it. My favorite sorts of movies are sci-fi, psycho/drama movies, and I love some gangster ones, too.
Are you into true crime and dark history? Any favorite cases?
Yes I love true crime, it’s one of my other “passions” and it is why I’ve started my studies on this subject, principally about criminal psychology.
I have lots of favorite cases and interesting stories, but I’m mostly interested in killers that are sadistic, cannibals, necrophiliacs, etc. Off the top of my head, I will say the classic Ted Bundy, but more his personality. Also Armin Meiwes with his need to eat another man. And finally, the extremely perverted and sadistic couple Fred and Rose West.
I came across your work via our mutual friend Nico Claux. What’s your connection with him?
My first contact with Nico Claux was concerning the “Bundyldo” that I’m the ambassador for. I’ve just fall in love with that dildo! Then I’ve realized later that he was also working in Camion Noir.
That pandemic restrained me at home, and I had to stay in lockdown and I had to stop my IRL BDSM session. I’ve been frustrated that I cannot achieve any of my desires. I started to think about them and that drove me a bit crazy. I’ve decided to write a book about my perversions, my feelings about them and the psychology behind them.
I have contacted Nico and talked with him to see if it is something he will be interested in publishing, and he said “Yes!” So as I’m doing this interview, I’m also working on that book. I will say more in it about my childhood, my BDSM experiences, my relationship with pain, etc.
Who is your personal “idol”? Is there someone you look up to and feel inspiration from?
For my look/tattoos and for BDSM I have no idol nor inspiration. This is just all my own feelings that are coming out. For the way I dress in my fetish clothes in Rubber or Leather I have been inspired a lot by Atomage and DeMasK. I was in fashion and clothing school when I was a teenager. Fashion and pleasure are just perfect for me!
If someone reading this wants to experience a “session” with you, how does it happen? Where would you like me to send them?
He/she should go to my website https://www.lunatikasm.com/ and answer the questions I’m asking in my “Contact” page. If the questions are not all answered properly, I will not give an answer. If the answers that he/she gave me are not compatible with myself and what I’m proposing, I will not bother answering, or I will just say “Not compatible”.
Anything you would like to add that I forgot to ask about?
No, apart from: Happy Perverted New Year!
And finally, my regular questions.
Your top 3 films?
– 2001 : A Space Odyssey.
– A Clockwork Orange
– Salo, or the 120 days of Sodom
Your top 3 books?
– Justine, or The Misfortunes of Virtue
– Daddy’s Little Earner: A Heartbreaking True Story of a Brave Little Girl’s Escape from Violence
– The 1976 Psychological Assessment of Ted Bundy (Development of the Violent Mind)
Your top 3 albums?
Portishead – Dummy
The Clash – Sandinista
Igorr – Hallelujah
